Why Some Voice-Talent Didn't Win:
As stated in this week's instructions, we wanted the listener to "hang onto the narrator's every word." There were no throw-away lines (as there seldom are, but this week especially).
Unfortunately, no one quite satisfied us in this regard. There were many reasons.
Some actors were way over the top, trying too hard. In fact, a few entrants had terrific timing, emphasis, and delivery, and would have won except either they sounded forced, or they pushing everything a bit too much.
In most cases, though, entrants seemed scared to really let go and act. Many entrants had terrific ideas: good choices of dramatic pauses, tempo changes, emotional changes, and more... yet no one took these far enough. If only we could take each read and run it through an "emotion multiplier" (the way we can increase volume or extend a pause), then we'd have many terrific reads. But there is no such thing, so it's all up to you.
In other words, its as if we were tasting soup that had great ingredients, but not enough of each of them. Adding more of the same ingredients will make it more flavorful.
But we should clarify. By releasing your inhibition and letting go, you truly express the strong fear and other emotions that the lines of this scene require, we don't mean you should exaggerate other aspects of your presentation to the point that it becomes a parody. Some of the entries took more the campy tone (no pun intended) of a ghost story. Yes, a ghost story should be made suspenseful (which jibes with our instruction), but is not necessarily "real" (and its listeners know that). It is not enough to sort of whisper out this scene in a low, sort-of scary tone. In an audiobook such as this, if you use too hushed a tone, or a juvenile presentation, you've flopped on the wrong side of the fence.
Also note that we've said "fear and other emotions that the lines of this scene require." By referencing "the lines" of the scene, not just the scene as a whole, we mean to emphasize that each line calls for a distinct emotion. In some lines, maybe even mixed emotions. For example, where Tim thinks, “please don’t move..” several times. Some people said all three virtually identically. Each case can (and almost always should) be said differently, which adds variety, but more importantly conveys the evolution of emotion as the scene (and the situation) progresses.
Certainly, there should be a difference in tone from where the narrator is just explaining Tim's situation, as opposed to when we are actually hearing Tim's own thoughts. Imagine the tension you would feel if you had to yell "Look out!" but are not allowed to make the slightest sound. That is the situation here.
We chose this scene for that reason. In the movie, each point in the scene has a different visual image. The music score matches the changes, as do the screen actor's emotions. As we recently advised in another contest, practice this exercise:
1. Pick apart this audition. Assign a different emotion to each phrase. It's okay if a few phrases have the same emotion, but not too many in repetition.
2. Read each phrase separately, really showing-off the emotion.
3. Edit everything together.
4. Voila - you'll be left with an audition where your vocal delivery changes appropriately and continues to captivate the listener.
The problem, of course, is that now everything sounds edited together. So repeat the exercise, but this time read continuously, changing the emotions as you did before.
Here's also so easier homework, something everybody should do: Identify unusual words to be sure you pronounce them correctly, and if you're not familiar with them, look them up.
The pronunciation of "velociraptor" might be arguable within very narrow limits, but it is definitely not correct to say, "vel-sol-a-raptor," "vela-sa-raptor" or "vela-se-raptor," all of which we heard.
For pronunciation guidance, here are two resources:
Dictionary.com
Howjsay.com
The former has an audio pronunciation of most words, in this case based on the Random House Dictionary. The latter is useful, but beware that it might have a British accent, and is robotic (although presumably the robot is reading correct phonetic symbols, not just the spelling).
Citing the widely accepted Random House dictionary, Dictionary.com shows pronunciation as "və-lŏs'ə-rāp'tər," which translates roughly to "veh LAH seh RAP ter." (For a precise guide, see
http://dictionary1.classic.reference.com/help/ahsd/pronkey.html, although even the pronunciation of "ā" (long A) is confusing, giving both "pat" and "grateful" as examples!) In both sources, the online voices give strongest emphasis to the "rap" syllable, although as we recall it used in various documentaries and movies, it might be acceptable to give "lah" and "rap" equal emphasis, or only the "lah." (And please note -- what a scientist says in a documentary on his own field is probably acceptable, but movie actors are sometimes wrong. It still grates us to hear Christopher Lloyd in Back to the Future pronounce "gigawatts" as "jigawatts." Except ... some sources say that was the preferred pronunciation, at least at the time, and one technical authority even gives, "gijawatts"! Go figure.)
So sometimes all you can do is give it your best effort and let the client decide. But don't submit something that everyone would agree is wrong.
Lets move on to timing. Some reads were choppy, some needed more space between phrases. In addition, in many cases the words could have been read more slowly. In an audiobook it is important to leave time for the listener to hear the words and conjure up a mental image. This "space" is what helps draw the listener in. That is, if it is done right. As with so many other aspects of voice over, it's a matter of timing, in combination with emotion and other factors.
For example, many people spaced out the words “looked right at Tim,” pausing between words. This can work very well if done using the right emphasis. Otherwise it sounds choppy.
And finally, there were the cases of bad audio. Glitches such as excessive breaths, background noises, mouth clicks and chairs moving are distracting.
In some cases this was because the actor was too close to the microphone, causing excessive wind noise, pops, and boominess. This technique produces "proximity effect," an increase of bass (low) tones. (The amount of proximity effect possible varies from between mic models.) Sometimes you can use "close-mic'ing" to advantage. It adds a fullness to the voice, and sounds like "you're right beside me." These can helps bring the listener into the story.
But if not done correctly, the results are nasty. You need a popper-stopper (mesh screen), need to control how you release your air, and should be able to hear and edit out any missed deep breaths, pops, and so on. If you mix on inexpensive speakers, they may not reproduce the bass well enough to hear these things. In this case, either get better speakers or try good headphones. You may be surprised what you have not been hearing... yet sending to your clients.
Stumped by a pronunciation? EdgeStudio.com includes a page devoted to Speech and Dictionaries Speech and Dictionaries that have audio examples. Be sure to browse though all our voice over resources!
