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An adaptation from, Would like to meet. A story by Karen Holmes...
When the chicken attacked her, ripping four inches of fabric out of her best trousers, she knew it was time to start telling the truth.
As the bird's beak made contact with the seat of her pants. she let out an ear-piercing scream. The chicken's owner Graham, was a step or two in front of her. He spun round alarmingly, "Hillary!" he shouted, "what happend? Are you OK?
Her name was Laura, Hillary is the offending chicken.
Graham pushed her aside in his haste to offer her comfort. He picked up the evil-eyed fowl and cradled her in his arms. "Poor baby!" he crooned. Then he looked at her accusingly. "You must be carful," he said. "She's a Copper Neck Maran. Hilary's French and very sensitive. Loud noises can put her off laying." "But she bit me!" wailed Laura. "Nonsense" retorted Graham. "There isn't a vicious bone in her body." There wouldn't be any bones in her body if I had my way, she thought to herself. She'd be reduced to chickent stock.